


over you

by lifeinabeautifullight



Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Danvers Sisters, F/F, Hurt/Comfort
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-30
Updated: 2020-03-30
Packaged: 2021-02-28 16:33:45
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,961
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23400145
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lifeinabeautifullight/pseuds/lifeinabeautifullight
Summary: when Alex's fiancee is cruelly snatched away from her, Kara is there for her sister.it really sinks in, you knowwhen i see it in stone
Relationships: Alex Danvers/Maggie Sawyer
Comments: 27
Kudos: 119





	over you

One day they’re planning a wedding; the next, she’s planning a funeral.

_ HERO COP KILLED. _

_ DETECTIVE MURDERED. _

_ NCPD HEARTBREAK: OFFICER DEAD AGED 30.  _

Maggie’s photo appears on the front cover of every newspaper, as well as in every news bulletin. Kara does her best to shield her sister from it all but it's not really necessary anyway, as Alex is too heartbroken to turn on the TV, pick up a paper, or even look at her phone. Uttering a sentence seems too much.

Not wanting to leave her alone in an apartment haunted by reminders of a lifetime that was about to begin, Kara takes Alex to Midvale. They spend a week or so there, as Kara acts as the go-between for her sister and the NCPD to make the arrangements for the funeral. 

It was going to be the send-off she deserved.

It was going to be held in the church they’d booked for December.

‘Maggie liked that church,’ is Alex's reasoning, and it's more than enough.

More decisions are made during the week, and they arrive back in NC the day before the service, staying at Kara’s. She lets Alex take the bed whilst she takes the couch.

She can’t sleep.

She can’t ignore the muffled sobs that are louder than usual.

She pads through to the bedroom and crawls in beside her sister. ‘I know, I know,’ she whispers. And she does know - she’d lost everything once before too.

Alex ends up falling asleep in her arms but, come morning, she’s not there, nor is she in the apartment.

She’s in her own apartment, locked in the bathroom.

Pressing a hand to the door that her sister is sat up against, Kara speaks softly. ‘Alex.’ It’s grief, it’s heartbreak, it’s losing that part that made you whole. Asking if she was okay would be the stupidest question in the world. So she doesn’t. ‘I’m gonna stand out here, okay? You don’t have to talk, you don’t have to do anything but I’m here, I won’t go anywhere.’ 

The service starts in a little under five hours.

The silence lasts for a good fifteen minutes.

Then, finally, ‘I don’t want to go.’

‘She’d want you there.’

‘No,’ Alex says. ‘No, she wouldn’t...she wouldn’t want this. She, she...was far too young, she had plans,  _ we _ had plans. Get married...travel...get a dog...have a--.’ Her voice catches. ‘--a family.’

_ A whole life together. _

‘It’s not fair.’

It wasn’t. Life liked being cruel to Alex, and loved being cruel to Maggie. They still had no leads on her killer and it was unlikely they ever would. It was a hit, and a cop like her had a neverending list of enemies. Justice would never bring her back but it might’ve eased the pain ever so slightly...and they seemed unlikely to even get that. ‘I know it’s hard but today is about celebrating her. She deserves to be celebrated.’

‘I know, I know, I...I just I...I want her.’ The dams have broken. ‘I...I  _ need _ her. I can’t do this without her, I can’t, I--.’

‘Can I come in?’ It's a gentle question and, whilst she respects her sister’s space, she needs to comfort her.

And she knows Alex will open the door, and her arms are ready for her.

‘I don’t want to say goodbye, I...I can’t, I…’ She collapses into Kara’s arms.

This wasn’t a broken heart.

This was a broken person.

~ ~ ~

Time helps.

Time doesn’t heal.

Her sister becomes accustomed to missing that part of her. After three weeks, she returns to work, a fractured shell of who she used to be. Her presence commands pity as much as it does respect, as everyone tiptoes around her - Kara knows she hates that, but she also knows that Alex is not yet at a stage where she can manage anything other than that.

Kara gently suggests therapy.

Alex vetoes that.

Kara understands, she’ll take care of her until she’s ready.

Maggie’s also taking care of Alex.

‘You know, when shit would happen, I would drink,’ Alex had said a few days after Maggie’s passing. ‘But I haven’t, not a single drop nor do I want to. ‘Cause Maggie...she taught me that wasn’t good, that wasn’t healthy...she was right. Look what happened when dad died. I spiralled. I nearly threw my life away in college. So no. No alcohol. She wouldn’t want that.’

A part of Kara thinks to use the  _ ‘Maggie wouldn’t want… _ ’ line for other things.

A bigger part of Kara, however, knows that would be wrong, that emotional manipulation would not be what Maggie would want either.

So she continues what she’s been doing, which is all she can do - being there for her sister, no matter how hard it is to watch a broken woman trying to piece together the shattered pieces.

_ Hard _ doesn’t even begin to cover it.

‘What is this?’

‘My letter of resignation,’ Alex replies. ‘You can read if you want, there’s nothing personal in there, just a lengthy way of saying  _ I quit _ .’

‘Why?’

Alex shrugs. ‘Why not? It’s not like there’s anything keeping me there. The only reason I ever got the job was to protect you and you’re more than capable of looking after yourself.’

‘That’s not true, you got it on your own merit.’

‘ _ My own merit _ ?’ Alex laughs. ‘I was failing med school and had been arrested. I didn’t deserve to walk into a job like that, be real.’

‘The work you’ve done says otherwise.’

‘Well, then think of how good the work of someone who actually deserves it will be.’ Alex reaches to take the letter back.

Kara stops her by tearing it in half.

‘Really?’

‘Alex, you can’t do this.’ Four months it’s taken for that foot to come down and, albeit, it comes down begrudgingly. She doesn't want to give tough love but Alex is starting to spiral.

‘I can print out another letter. Hell, I can email J’onn the damn thing.’

‘And I will advise him to decline it.’ Her sister wasn’t thinking clearly and, understandably, hadn’t since her fiancee passed. ‘You love this job and you deserve to be here. At least sit down with him, talk about things before rushing into anything. He has your best interests at heart, Alex. We all do. And we want you to be--.’ She stops herself from saying it.

Alex figures it out. ‘ _ Happy _ ? Yeah, I’d like that too. Try telling that to the bastard that took her away from me.’

~ ~ ~

Alex sits down with J’onn.

Alex continues at the DEO but decides to shift her focus from the field to the lab, starting a new research project that helps to take her mind off things. It’s the first time Kara’s seen her sister excited about anything in months, and glimmers of her old self return.

Five months after Maggie’s passing, Alex finally steps foot in the bar that held so many memories. She doesn’t drink, in her fifth month of sobriety now, but quietly nurses a Coke as the rest of the Superfriends chat amongst themselves.

Progress.

‘It’s Alex, isn’t it?’

Alex looks up at the gentleman who asked. ‘Yeah.’

The man nods. ‘Maggie was a friend. She helped my family and I find refuge in this city, and paid a whole month’s rent for us, upfront, so we could secure an apartment. She never asked for a dime back. She was a great person, and I’m sorry for your loss.’

‘Thank you for sharing that.’

He pulls out a set of keys, and works one of the fobs off, setting in front of Alex. ‘She gave me this so I wouldn’t lose the key. Got my own now so thought you might want it.’ He places a hand on her shoulder. ‘Name’s Ricky, by the way. If there’s anything I can do for you then just call. The bartender has my number.’ And, with that, he leaves.

Running her thumb over the scratched plastic casing of the faded  _ Grand Canyon _ keyfob, a smile appears on Alex’s lips. ‘She had this when we…’ It’s still an adjustment for her to use past tense so she tends to avoid it. ‘She kept this on her keys. It disappeared all of a sudden and I didn’t think much of it, it was a crappy old keyring, y’know? And there she was, changing someone’s life without saying a damn thing about it. That, that selflessness...that’s why I love her.’ Present tense because, whilst she may be gone, Alex’s love would always remain.

~ ~ ~

As the smiles become a little more frequent and lasting, Kara takes a small step back, to allow her sister space to breathe after so long struggling to do just that.

She keeps an eye on her, of course, she’s careful not to run that risk of falling for fake smiles but she knows Alex so she feels confident to do so - that, and the fact that J’onn’s keeping an ear out, ready to raise an alarm if need be.

The gang have their first game night in almost seven months.

Alex laughs as she wins at  _ Monopoly _ . ‘That was easy.’

It was  _ easy _ . They’d all purposely made it so.

Everyone leaves Kara’s apartment a little after eleven. Alex hangs back. ‘I, uh...I gotta tell you. I started therapy about a month or so ago.’

More progress. ‘I’m proud of you for taking that step.’

‘It's not as scary as I thought,’ Alex says with a small smile. ‘Don’t get me wrong, it’s tough and it’s a lot of talking and I know it won’t ever bring her back but...it’s helping.’

‘I can tell.’

‘I can feel it, that weight starting to lift...I never thought that was possible.’ Alex fidgets with the sleeve of her navy sweater. ‘It won’t ever go away completely, I know that but some relief is better than suffocating.’

As someone who’d lost their whole world too, Kara would agree.

‘I like it, my therapist is great,’ Alex says. ‘And I get to sit and talk about her, remembering how great our time together was. And that...that also hurts, ‘cause we should’ve had more, and she should still be here but--.’ Alex’s knuckles whiten. A deep breath, the fist unclenches. ‘I get to remember the good times, and I feel lucky I had all that, even if it was...brief.’

Wrapping an arm around her sister’s shoulders, Kara pulls her close. ‘I’m proud of you. She would be too.’

‘She would make a lame joke about how I’m so in love with her I need therapy.’

Kara chuckles. ‘Yeah, that’s Maggie.’

‘A wiseass.’

‘Yep.’

And, then, a sigh. ‘I miss her.’

‘I know.’

‘It’s been so long but every time my phone buzzes, I still think it’s her.’

‘That’s normal.’

‘I wish it wasn’t,’ Alex mumbles.

‘I do too,’ Kara says. ‘I do too.’

~ ~ ~

The Anniversary.

Uncharted, and delicate territory, Kara thinks about how best to approach this day, and ultimately decides on donuts and a small bouquet of flowers.

Alex opens the door and her eyes instinctively fall on the  _ Noonan’s _ box. ‘Those for me?’

‘Well, I was thinking we could share but--.’

Alex snatches them out of her hand. ‘Thank you.’

The good mood is...surprising. Yes, Alex had been doing a lot better in recent months but still...her fiancee had been murdered a year ago on this day, it would only be natural to be downbeat. ‘So, uh--.’

‘So how am I doing?’

Kara nods.

‘My heart is heavier today,’ Alex admits. ‘But that’s normal, that’s okay, and I’m doing good.’

It seems genuine, and Kara feels relieved. ‘What’s your plans for today?’ It was a Saturday, so no work. ‘If you want company, I can stay and hang out, I--.’

‘I’m going to her grave.’

_ Oh _ .

‘It’s been too long, I need to go.’

_ Too long _ was almost nine months. Kara had been there, watching as her sister broke down, desperate for a miracle, desperate for the woman that had grounded her to come back and anchor her in happier tides. The sadness of Alex’s words would always echo in her mind.

_ ‘I am so lost without you.’ _

That day had been the first visit since the funeral. Seeing it in stone - the brevity, the  _ what ifs _ \- had been too much.

And it was still daunting. ‘Can you, uh...can you come with me?’

They head there just after midday.

Alex doesn’t bring flowers. ‘I thought this would be more apt,’ she says as she puts down the little bonsai tree. ‘It's not one of yours, I bought this one. Yours are doing good though, I’ve been looking after them.’ A little laugh. ‘Yeah that’s right, you’d make a smart remark but I’ve learned how to look after them.  _ Never let the soil become completely dry _ ... _ pinch and trim back the new growth to the farthest safest point _ ... _ repot periodically _ . See? I’ve learned.’

Kara smiles.

A finger traces the first letter of the name that used to constantly flash up on her phone. ‘I, uh...I wish I knew what to say besides stating the obvious.’

_ I love you. _

_ I miss you. _

_ I wish you were still here. _

‘And it's funny because there’s a lot I want to say - you know me, I never shut up - but it’s just...I don’t think I’m at that stage yet. So...if you don’t mind the company, I’m just gonna sit here for a little while. I hope that’s okay? If not gimme a sign or what--.’

Kara’s phone starts to ring. She fumbles for it. ‘Shit, I--.’

Alex laughs. ‘She’s glaring at you right now.’

‘I’m sorry, I’m sorry.’ It’s the DEO, and the number that flashes up when it's urgent. ‘I--.’

‘Have to go, yeah,’ Alex nods. ‘Go.’

‘I can come right back as soon as I can if that’s what you want, I--.’

Alex shakes her head. ‘No,’ she smiles. ‘I’m good here. I’m with Maggie.’

‘Okay,’ Kara nods. ‘I’ll catch you later.’ And after a quick kiss to her sister’s temple, she sprints off and takes off into the sky.

~ ~ ~

Toes are dipped into the dating pool.

Hesitant, nervous, confused...each toe represents a different feeling. ‘This is stupid.’

‘It’s not.’ Kara peeks over Alex’s shoulder. ‘You’re over halfway through. Don’t give up now. C’mon. What’s your ideal date night?’

‘Dinner at Raneri’s.’

_ Oh.  _

_ Maggie’s favorite restaurant. _

It wasn’t necessarily a stupid idea, but it had been Alex’s to try out online dating - she’d figured that it might be easier to find someone to date that way what with her crazy, unpredictable and typically draining work hours. She’d quickly ruled out  _ Tinder _ , settling for a more traditional site. ‘You could just put  _ a nice dinner somewhere _ ,’ Kara suggests.

So that’s what Alex puts.

~ ~ ~ 

Her name is Katherine.

An emergency room physician, she was smart, she was caring, she was--.

‘Annoying,’ Alex looks traumatized as she marches into Kara’s apartment, plonking herself down on the couch, and snatching the bowl of popcorn. ‘God, she was annoying.’

~ ~ ~

Weeks of work rested on this.

Director Danvers gives her agents a final briefing, and her rifle a final check before giving the order to go.

‘Move out.’

Kara’s in a holding position over the waterfront.

Clark is to her right.

J’onn, James, Brainy and Nia are all on the ground.

They’re in Metropolis and are about to take down an alien trafficking ring with strong ties to Cadmus. Too many had gone missing since the turn of the year, so they figured they’d hit the base hard and fast, and ensure the job was done.

‘Supers, on my count,’ Alex’s steady, solider steps could be heard through the comms. ‘Three...two...one.’

They move, bursting through high windows on either side of the old warehouse.

As expected, there’s resistance.

Bullets are flying.

The situation is good though, they have the upper hand with more men and more firepower and--

_ ‘Aaargh,’  _ crackles through the comms.

‘Alex?’ She scans the room.

_ ‘No...son of a--.’  _

A thud.

A groan.

Kara finally spots her, in a scuffle close by the fire exit.

_ ‘...no, you--.’ _

She’s mid-air when she feels a sharp sting in her back, her strength suddenly escaping her. She crashes to the ground. ‘ _ Rao _ .’ 

Clark lands beside her. ‘Here.’ He pulls the dart out. ‘Kryptonite dartgun. Gangway, five o’clock. J’onn--.’

_ ‘Has got the bastard,’  _ the Martian informs through comms.

Offering a hand, Clark pulls her to her feet. 

She’s a little unsteady, a little shaky but otherwise good. ‘A-Alex, she’s--.’

‘On it.’ Clark zooms off.

Agents storm past her, Brainy bringing up the rear. ‘Supergirl, are you okay?’

‘Yeah.’ A little dart like that must be what humans felt when getting tazed. She’s fine, it’s just jarring and she needs a few moments to refocus, for the tingles to subside.

Then she’s joining her cousin, who’s with a slightly bloodied Alex who's sat up against a rusting storage container and--

‘Maggie?’

The cop looks like a deer in the headlights. There’s a metal rod in her hand, and a bad guy lying at her feet. She takes a few seconds before blinking back to reality. ‘Downstairs. That’s where they’re holding them.’

‘Are you--.’

‘I’ll stay with Alex. You both go.’

It seems too good to be true.

So Kara doesn’t believe it. ‘Stay here,’ she instructs her cousin.

‘What? No.’

‘Listen to him, Kara.’

She won’t, and she won’t listen to Maggie either. ‘Maggie died. This can’t be her, this has to be--.’ She spots Maggie about to tend to her dazed sister. ‘Stay back.’

Maggie’s palms are raised. ‘Okay, okay.’

‘Kara, it’s fine,’ Clark insists. ‘She was here before I was, she saved Alex’s life.’

‘But--.’

‘Trust me,’ his voice is firm.

She knows they’re wasting time but she doesn’t understand, so settles for a compromise. ‘Agent Dawson,’ she catches one of the passing men. ‘Stay here, watch over the Director.’ 

The Agent nods. ‘Yes ma’am.’

‘And restrain her,’ she points at Maggie.

Maggie doesn’t resist. ‘Fine.’

They’d deal with this shortly.

~ ~ ~

The mission was a success. Fifteen aliens - three of them kids - were safely rescued, with no fatalities. No agents were lost or badly wounded, either. 

Alex was hurt, but it was nothing more than a few stitches and she was, currently, being assessed for a concussion.

So it was Kara that was heading down to the holding cells of the old police station, which was acting as a Metropolis DEO HQ - talks were happening for a more permanent facility to be built, with Clark helping to run things but, for now, this was all they had.

Maggie stands as Kara approaches. ‘I can explain.’

‘You better,’ Kara unlocks the door. ‘Because my sister has been a wreck since you left her. Honestly, there were times I thought I’d lost her, forever.’

‘Yeah, I felt the same way too,’ Maggie mumbles.

‘So, c’mon.’ Kara crosses her arms. ‘Let’s hear it. Let’s hear why you broke my sister’s heart. Cold feet?’

The suggestion seems to offend her. ‘What? Kara, no. You know I love her, I couldn’t wait to marry her. My feet weren’t cold, they would’ve ran to that altar if they could.’

‘But they didn’t. And I had to hold my sister as she’d cry herself to sleep night after night.’ Kara didn’t know humans could cry that much. It would be impressive if it weren’t so heartbreaking. ‘I had to carry her away from your grave because she was crying so much she could barely breathe, let alone walk.’

Maggie looks down at the ground.

‘She lost a part of herself when she lost you so, tell me. Why? Why did you do it? And why the hell was my cousin sticking up for you like that?’

‘Because…’ Maggie sighs. ‘Because he knew.’

‘What?’

‘In fact, he helped facilitate it.’

‘Kal was in on it?’

Maggie nods. ‘We kept in touch after the Daxamite invasion. I needed help, I called him, he made it all happen. And please, please don’t be mad at him. It was as much to protect you as it was Alex.’ 

Trying to process it all, Kara paces a little. ‘So...it was to protect us? What...what happened?’

‘I got in too deep with looking into Cadmus,’ Maggie explains. ’I was trying to find Jeremiah but I...stumbled upon very delicate information. They were either going to kill me or, more likely, kill a loved one to warn me off. And I...well. I don’t have many loved ones.’

Kara stops pacing. That admission hurts. It wouldn’t have been an easy call, and she felt bad for coming across so aggressively. Of course, Maggie loved Alex. She loved her more than anything in the world. Everyone knew that. ‘You should’ve said something.’

‘I wanted to. I really did,’ the cop stresses. ‘But you don’t know the severity of the situation, Kara. Lillian has not been resting on her laurels. She’s sat on enough Kryptonite, she could kill you and, believe me, she wants to. I had to disappear. It was the only way.’

‘There had to have been another.’ And one that didn’t involve two soulmates being brutally forced apart.

‘If there was, then I would’ve gone down that route. You think this was easy for me? Alex is the love of my--.’ She stops as Alex enters the room.

Kara steps to the side, not wanting to be between and unsure if she should even be staying.

‘I…’ Alex’ bottom lip is trembling, and her eyes are wet as she takes small steps closer and closer. ‘I thought you were dead.’

‘I’m sorry. So sorry.’

‘I mourned you, I missed you, I…’ She gives up and walks into arms that open for her.

‘Hey,’ Maggie says softly as Alex buries her head into her chest. ‘I’m here.’

‘Please...please tell me this is real,’ Alex whispers.

‘Its real. I promise you, its real.’

~ ~ ~

It was time to step completely back.

For the next few days, Kara doesn’t see her sister or even hear from her. It’s the longest, maybe ever, that they haven’t spoken. And that is okay. Alex wants to be with Maggie, and Kara respects that, stressing that she’s there if needed and leaving it at that. 

It’s evening and Kara’s in her apartment, finishing transcribing an interview when there’s a knock at the door. She pauses her dictaphone, saves her file and goes to answer.

‘You’re not busy, are you?’ It’s Alex with the biggest smile, and Maggie by her side.

‘‘Cause if you are, we can go elsewhere.'  The ring that had hung on a chain around Alex’s neck for the past year and a half was now back where it belonged - on Maggie’s hand.

Kara steps aside. ‘Come in, come in.’

Alex’s step is a lot lighter. ‘Are you working?’

‘It’s my article on Nia, the deadline is not until next week, it’s fine.’

‘Nia?’ Maggie asks.

‘You’d best know her as Dreamer,’ Alex says. ‘She was with us the other day, the girl in the blue and white suit.’

‘Ah, I remember.’

‘She works alongside Kara at CatCo. That’s how we met her.’

And, just like old times, Alex and Maggie take their seat on the couch - Alex on the left, Maggie on the right, like nothing had ever changed. 

‘You guys want anything to drink?’

Alex stretches out, her leg finding its way into the familiar resting place of Maggie’s lap. ‘What do you want?’ She asks her fiancee.

‘Wine?’

Alex nods. ‘Wine, please. Preferably red if you have it.’

It’s the first time in almost two years that Alex drinks.

**Author's Note:**

> thoughts and comments are always appreciated down below.
> 
> ~ title, and lyrics in the summary come from Miranda Lambert's 'Over You' ~


End file.
